Hey Readers.
Been a while since I let out my feelings, and in that period,
I have learnt so much and grown quite a lot. Not just physically (My cute tummy)
but a lot mentally. I had to take some life changing decisions. I had to get
rid of a lot of stress that I was facing, and I had to basically believe in
myself for me to go forward.
This article is a little heartfelt and in a lot of ways,
stuff I went through in the last couple of months. I met a lot of friends, spoke
to a lot of inspirational people and they helped me look at my life in a way I
missed out on. A disclaimer before we go ahead, this is not for the narrow minded folks, so if you think you are one of them and won't be able to tolerate my complaints, don't hesitate and close your browser.
The circle of life as they call it, can sometimes be
baffling. I am advocating the whole “what goes around comes around”. We get
what we deserve because of the things we did in our past. Personally, I screwed
up a lot in the past and I get the reward for being an ass from time to time. I
have no shame in accepting that I was one but changing over a new leaf is
something I genuinely believe in. I have been on a quest of making things right
from my past and so far, it has helped me take off the stress in my life. But in
doing so, I learnt a lot about our country and how society has affected us and
our decision making. I truly felt disgusted with the way we, the society are
failing ourselves. I thought to myself that I would love to write about this
and see if people could relate to what I felt.
A friend of mine who is in her 30’s wanted to be an
independent woman as she grew up. I commend her dedication towards her career
and I was in the impression, that someone like her who is so mature and
dedicated would be a catch for men, but instead she is ridiculed in the society
for her age and not being married. I am perplexed as to why a woman who chooses
to marry late is considered a woman with issues, where as a man who wants to
marry late is commended since he cares about getting stable financially or to
stabilize his career.
A friend of mine who loved this girl, truly wished to get
married to her. He loved her more than anything in the world and decided that
she is the one he wants to spend the rest of his life with. Hard find right?
But guess what, she dumped him for she didn’t think her parents would agree to
her getting married to a guy who doesn’t have a financial background as good as
them. The guy promised the girl that he would get strong financially and all he
needed was time. She promised him the time he needed but ended up dumping him
later. I didn’t think the girl was to blame completely, but in our country,
parents don’t really care about how well or stable a guy can be, but how much
property or what not, his parents or him own. Well, to anyone who has that kind
off mentality, all I can say is Sayonara Sweetheart.
I think as the new generation, we owe it to our parents to
teach them everything that they did wrong in the name of tradition instead of
wanting to follow anything that they said. I have seen people rebel in front of
the world, but again, when it came to their parents, they would just dial down.
I know we ought to love our parents (no choice there!) but I would at the least
argue with them to help them realize that just because something is a
tradition, it doesn’t need to be right.
A very close friend was a victim of the above. He sucked at Mathematics, but his father was hell bent on wanting him to get a bank job (This is a
different topic altogether, the weird obsession in our country for bank jobs).
He was forced to take up bank exams and failed every time. He just could not
muster the courage to talk to his dad and tell him, he wanted a different
choice of career. He spent 2 to 3 years doing it and finally regretted his
decision because he had wasted a lot of time in something he just could not do.
I don’t mean to insult him, not everybody is cut out for jobs like these. That’s
why we have got so many professions in the world where we can showcase what we
are good at.
The last one, I have for starters, a friend of mine told me
a story that gave me chills. I know we live in a country where believe it or
not, caste and religion play a big role in marriages. No surprise there, but,
here comes the bomb. I got to know about a few families who apparently don’t even
relate themselves to other caste or religion folks as friends and restrict
their kids from mingling with people who don’t belong to their “community”. I
seriously hope never to get involved with such people because the reason our so
called “secular” country is going to ruins is all thanks to them. Parents,
relatives and society would not mind us getting married to some well settled guy
from their caste but not to someone who can keep us happy and feel loved. They
would rather want us to “work” on an abusive relationship but not want us to
get divorced and feel free.
High time that we as a generation work towards stuff like
this. Don’t say that your kids will be free to choose. You need to choose. You need
to be free. Grow up mentally and talk to me if you think you can relate to what
is above.
We are one as a country, but we need to be one as a
community.
Very nicely put da. So true. But guess we are stuck in this murk forever.
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