Hey Readers,
Hope you are doing well. I have been away for quite a while
and my life has progressed so much from my last post. I am officially done with
my master’s degree (Woot Woot!) and I am in the stage of starting my career again
hopefully in the UK. Choosing this degree was a stupid choice but I don’t have
any regrets because it was a challenge that I enjoyed attempting.
I am writing about a topic that is so close to my heart and
a topic that I feel a lot of my readers can relate to. I want to talk about all
the things that we attempt or pursue in life and how ambitious we are about
getting past the finish line. Do we need to know when we should give up if we
fail? If yes, how do we decide that? Is it our decision? Is it something our
friends and family guide us with? Let’s talk this out.
I have had my share of bad decisions in life. It started
from school, went into college, then with my career and most importantly my choice
of friends and relationships. I have tried holding onto the wrong choices for a
very long time not realizing that it was toxic in nature and how it affected
not just me but also the people around me. I have been losing people all my
life and yet I always blamed myself for them leaving. When I look back at those
moments in life, I don’t regret losing them, because it has made my life better,
made me stronger, made me realize that life isn’t about who leaves but it is
about who stays! I am sure a lot of people will say the same about me as well. I
might not have been there for someone who considered me close, or I would have
left their life. I would love it if they confronted me about it and made me realize
what I did. If someone does value the fact that I am a part of their life, I wouldn’t
want to leave them.
Recently, a friend of mine was in a toxic relationship. One where
the abuse was emotional, mental, and verbal. But for some reason, the
relationship kept going on. Everyone around my friend would voice out their
opinions that this is not good, and the right decision would be to end it or
just give up in the belief or hope that things will get better. But it kept
going without any improvement in the outcome. This is not just being stubborn,
but it is about being naïve enough to not know when to give up! As much as we
want things in our life the way we want them, we have got to let go when it is
the right time. I was personally in a relationship where I questioned myself so
much about my background, about my family, about how I could become the next ambani
in life to impress my girl. But after the relationship ended, my heart gave way
for my mind to work, and it showed me that I ignored so many red flags and
warnings from everyone around me. I cannot blame anyone but me for what I went through,
and it has damaged me for life.
I tend to cling myself onto people I am usually with in
person which I agree is not a great thing to do and I am not proud of it. But when
I felt lonely here in the UK, I used to think that I have friends back home.
Friends I can count on, no matter what. But lately, I have come to realize that,
at some point, “Always” comes with conditions attached. I kept holding on to
the thought of friends for life, but little did I know that I would need to
give up on that too. I have been arguing with people who say “family stays,
friends don’t” because I honestly believed that friends are more supportive of us,
and they give two shits about our wellbeing. But I guess I was wrong about
that. All that we can do is play our part. Give up, but not too soon! Know when
to give up!
Guide people around you when you see that they are stuck, stuck
trying to achieve something that is not possible. Help your loved ones by being
there for them when they are lost, when you know that they need you, no matter
how hard it may be, be a critic in their life. Be their enemy who gives them
critical comments on their decisions. It will bring them on the right path. I
am known to be harsh with my loved ones. Some say I am a bully as well because
I ask people to make decisions based on the advice, I give them. But little does
everyone understand that my advice is usually focused on the best for the other
person. I am not someone who focuses on sugar-coating tough statements. I am
blunt about the stuff I believe in, and it tends to create an impression. But
someone who really understands me sticks around, and if they don’t, well, I will
give up!
I hope you all can relate to what I am saying!
This is me signing off!
Regards,
Aditya.